Top 8 Things To A Better Life

1. Faith in Christ and His Atoning Sacrifice-With everything I do and everything I am it is a moment to moment journey to have Faith and allow Christ to guide my path back home.
   
   
2. Live Your Truth-It is so easy to be sucked into the worldly life. All I have to do is, watch T.V., read a magazine, envy the latest fashions everyone around me is wearing. To live with personal integrity can seem difficult. To even figure out what my personal integrity is even more difficult. I took some time in the past couple months and really searched from the basics to the depth of who I am and how I want to reflect Christ-like love in my life.
   
   
3. Family- Through my healing I have been blessed with a loving and patient family to love and help me. I very special love has blossomed and bloomed in my heart towards my family. A gift of letting go, comes the gift of a new love. I have always loved my family, but in my weaknesses. I am being made strong with the gift of a new love.
   
   
4. Just Say No- In the idea of letting go. I am learning that saying no, can be one of the kindest and most loving word in the English language. I challenge you to find out what that means for you. I am still learning what a blessing this can be for the people I love and for myself....
   
   
5. Friendship- For me it has been a critical part of my healing to develop close and bonded friendships with people that might eventually hurt me. My list of friends is still rather small, but that's ok. I'm still learning how to nourish these friendships in a loving and appropriate way.
   
   
6. Simplicity- Money and spending money doesn't buy happiness. Time, buys more happiness than anything else in this life. Reflecting on the memories made in times of joy and sorrow is what brings us closer to our loved ones and to our Heavenly Father's plan. One of the most simplest things I love is sitting at the kitchen table first thing in the morning and watching out the window. It almost seems like I could see the leaves on the tress change to their beautiful fall colors. As the geese flew south for the winter in their instinctive V, is most precious.
   
   
7. Creativity- I recently discovered that I am creative. Wow, who would have known. I have always “copied” everyone else's creativity. As I was in the mist of just such a thing, I was lead another direction and when I was finished I couldn't recognize the original thing I set out to copy. I created all on my own...I loved it. Creativity will become part of living my truth.
   
   
8. Have Vision- I created a “vision board” several years ago, just because I heard it worked miracles...LOL I didn't have to much heart in it, but still. And step by step everything came to be. I sat looking at my vision board and realized that everything on my board had come to be realized. I decided to create a new vision board. It took weeks to search for the items on wanted on my board. Most all of the items weren't tangible like they had been on my previous board. It was hard for others to understand my board, to me it was perfectly clear. As I have developed more and more vision on my board I have in my life as well. I challenge you to find your vision as well.

Gifts of Christmas

I have had the most amazing Christmas season ever. Nothing is really any different. We are still financially strapped to give the gifts that are on the kids wish list. We still are just us, feeling basically separated from family. So what is so different that has made this Christmas season so amazing?

I can only hope that my heart has turned more toward Christ, and His eternal love. I have loved spending time with my family. I have loved reliving the memories through scrapbooking them as they happen. We haven't done anything extraordinary, unless you consider sitting around the table playing card games, eating popcorn, and watch a Christmas movie in the background. Ok, Ok, I guess that is extraordinary...

I am so thankful that Christ came to this earth for me and for you. He came to rescue me from my own Hell. Christ sacrificed His physical life, that I may live for eternity in His light and love.

As I wish you all a Merry Christmas, I pray that you find Christ and His love for you in this extraordinary season. 

How Many Imperfections Do I Have?

“Is it possible to develop discipleship when one has no initial, inner desires for discipleship? I don't know. Can we plant inner "desires" in someone against their will? External exhortation of such individuals won't usually produce much change. For most of us, however, even when the inner desire is there, it requires periodic sharpening of some outward circumstances to quicken any existing inner desires and to get us to act upon these. It was so with Abraham. Abraham desired a better life, more happiness, and the blessings of the holy priesthood (see Abraham 1:1-2). Outward circumstances were a spur to Abraham's yearnings, but clearly he had firm and basic desires of discipleship.

It's different in the case of prodigals, in the sense that turning away from the world and toward God, toward home, requires of them to make what I call the Great Pivot. This Great Pivot begins slowly and tentatively when the mind perceives what is in comparison with what might be. This represents the first tentative steps in the process of beginning to develop "the mind of Christ" (1 Corinthians 2:16).

…So, the lingering question should not be "How many imperfections do I have?" but, rather, "Is my discipleship sufficiently serious that I am working patiently and steadily to overcome those weaknesses, perhaps even changing some of them into strengths?" (See Ether 12:27.)”

Elder Neal A. Maxwell, Brigham Young University on 27 March 1994.

Are You Running Too Fast?

Sitting in the half-dark room, I confided to my Father In Heaven that I felt like a failure. I couldn't measure up to the expectations that life had for me.

• I had two young children, and I grandson. I found myself racing through the day trying to meet their needs.
  
  
• Our particular family's needs required that I cut coupons, and research ways to save money.
  
  
• I struggled with physical challenges and found myself facing depression, body aches, and of course headaches.
  
  
• I longed to serve and lift others who needed support.
  
  
• I needed time away from my burdens to participate in activities that lifted my spirits; however, I was finding it difficult to manage the time requirements of preparing for these activities.
  
  
• My mother and grandmother always made homemade bread. They bottled fruit, quilted, and sewed their children's clothing. I felt uncomfortable that I couldn't squeeze these activities into my days.
  
  
• I carried church service responsibilities and wanted to do as well as I could with these positions as I love to serve the Lord.

My list went on and on, and as I talked, tears streamed down my face. My chest felt heavy, and I supposed I would never measure up.

Once I had finished, my Heavenly Father quietly said, "Tisha, don't try to run faster than you are able."

It was classic Dad-wisdom gleaned from years of studying Scripture. When he has some advice for me, it was usually well said and directly on target, if I listen. I knew he was right. I was trying to run faster than I was able.

I have since heard it said that you can do many things in this life, but you can't do them all at once. Every life stage has its own requirements, and it's up to us to decide what's most important for us to do at any given moment. While we are deciding what we can or can't do, we need to be careful that we balance the following needs:

• Spiritual
• Physical
• Social
• Emotional

When I look back on that time, I can see that the pressure I experienced was self-imposed, largely because I believed I was being judged by other people. I thought that if I didn't scurry about, filling every waking moment with superb activities, I was failing my Heavenly Father. I knew that He had given me great gifts and believed that He wished me to use them, but I failed to understand that He didn't expect me to use them all at one time.

It has only been a couple years since my Heavenly Father told me to only run as fast as I am able. I periodically forget His advice, and when I do, I find myself frantic and downhearted. But the words come back to me, and I say again, "Thanks, Dear Father. You're right. I'll only run as fast as I am able."

I have discovered through the years that even though it might appear at any given moment that I am not accomplishing very much, in hindsight I have accomplished a lot. I've been able to go school, work with my horses, stretch my creativity through preserving my family history, work in exciting positions for large companies, run my own business, and yes, even make homemade bread once in a while.

But I did not do it all at once. I've been married for almost 16 years, and all of these activities – and more – have been dribbled throughout the years of my life in a measured way. It is only upon reflection that I can see how much I have been able to complete despite the periods of time when all I could manage was a slow crawl.

If you happen to be someone who feels torn by life and the things you feel you must do, I would advise you to take a breath and try to understand that as long as you are doing the best you can in any given moment, it is enough.

Until tomorrow, I will do the best I can today.

You Caught Me...

Yep, I know that I haven't posted this week. I've been down with a headache again. I am finally feeling like I am among the living again. Thank you to everyone, who recognized that I haven't posted and checked in on me....I love you for your thoughtfulness. 


I am planning on spending the weekend writing some post, so that when I become unavailable again,  I will have them ready for you...


Have a great weekend and I will look forward to seeing you here on Monday. May Angels Walk With You. 

Merry Christmas

I would like to take a moment to wish each of you a very merry Christmas season. I know that I don't know many of you, and definitely don't know your trials and hardships. My prayers are always with you. I'm so thankful that I have this opportunity to share my story with you, and I hope you are uplifted in some way. May Angles Walk With You...

The Best Day

What More Can I Say????

Creativity...

Creativity...what is it? As you are likely well aware of, I LOVE to scrapbook. I especially love looking at other people's beautiful works of art in their scrapbook pages. Although, I've always loved to scrapbook and preserve memories there is something missing in my creativity. Sure there is a creative evolution in my scrapbook pages from plain simple paper pages to now creating digital pages. Evolution isn't what's missing in my scrapbooking. Somewhat, evolution is part of the problem, fear. Fear is the driving factor of what is missing in my scrapbooking process.

I have been holding back because of my fear. In the past I've created amazing scrapbook pages, they are completely copied from someone else's pages, or they are templates. I've been afraid to express my creativity to the point I didn't even know what it was. How crazy does this sound?

Recently, I've opened up and found a new creative side. I think that writing this blog has had a lot to do with that. This blog is similar to a food journal...I hold myself accountable here. I have to be honest. No I don't write or at least publish everything I think. I believe somethings are still personal.

I downloaded some new templates a few days ago. I started working on a template, and suddenly saw a creation much different from the template. There were some things I still liked about the template, but ideas started to just flow. When the page was finished the original template was unrecognizable. I was and still am so excited! Somehow, by some miracle I have been set free. The fear to express myself is gone, and a whole new me has blossomed. Sure I will still lean on other people's ideas. There is no sense or need to recreate the wheel. But I will freely allow what inspires me to show it's self through not just my scrapbook pages, but also through how I live my life. What inspires you?

This is MY Scrapbook page...I hope you love it as much as I do.

December Stree

I know that December can be hyper stressful, at least it can be for me. I've been thinking...How can I lower my holiday stress level?

Over the past few weeks, I've been working on getting a new furnace. Since I live in a rural area, services life furnace’s can be very hectic and time consuming. Keeping my family warm in the winter here is highly important to me. I felt a push from within to get the new furnace installed. Instead, I choose to step back, and allow the flow of this process. I'm so excited that I did, because....

Everything is working out perfectly. Hoot Hoot, I'm so thankful that I can finally flow with the flow of life. I aint sayin' that I don't want what I want and want it now. Yep, that was meant to be confusing, because when I'm in that place it is confusing.

I am learning that it is great to want, it helps give me direction and of course forward motion. Within that want, freedom is found in giving into the natural flow. Things tend to blossom beyond my wants within this freedom.

I also want to comment on how wonderful people are. When I'm willing to follow the flow, people respond more willingly, kindly, and fast. I'm not saying that it's alright to pretend to go with the flow with a motive to get people to respond the way I want. It isn't...Sincerity is key.

Clean Out Your Closet...

This was just to beautiful to not share.  I'm sure like many of you, I think there is nothing better than spending the day listening to my favorite music and cleaning out my closet. 

Dorothy Hulst has written,

As the physically weak woman can make herself strong by careful and patient training, so the woman of weak thoughts can make them strong by exercising herself in right thinking.

To put away [weak and negative thoughts] and to begin to think with purpose, is to enter the ranks of those strong ones who only recognize failure as one of the pathways to attainment; and make all conditions serve them, and who think strongly, attempt fearlessly, and accomplish masterfully. [Dorothy Hulst, As a Woman Thinketh, a transcription for women of James Allen's essay As a Man Thinketh (Marina Del Rey, California: DeVorss and Company), p. 41]

It is possible to live with all your power in the present. You can replace old doubts with new hopes. So clean out that closet in your mind and haul a load of needless negative baggage off to D.I.

The Holy Present...

What is the holy present and why is it so hard to stay in it??? Elder Neal A. Maxwell in a devotional talk January 1999, taught the jumping to conclusions takes us away from living in the holy present.

I'm at fault of jumping to conclusions frequently. As a matter of fact, I'm in the middle of doing it right now. There has been a simple lack of communication between me and my brother. I was hoping for a much different result in a situation than I got. Immediately, I jumped to negative conclusions and of course a personal pity party. There is a list of “he should haves...” and I better than box way of being in that I began this, by calling him first. There is also a victim stance in that he should realize I've been sick and taken extra effort because of it.

I can't live in the present little lone the holy present, when I'm living in my own personal Hell. How could I have stayed in the holy present through this situation? I know that my brother has some life challenges. Wouldn't it have been more constructive if I would have considered my brother's life challenges, before jumping to conclusions?

I have wasted unnumbered amounts of time over this. I also wasted someone else's time by expressing how my feelings were hurt over this and of course pouring out the blame. Peace can only be found in the holy present. Even though my brother doesn't know that I've jumped to these conclusions, I still owe him and open and honest apology. I sincerely, love my brother, and know that he is doing everything in his power to support our relationship while juggling his trials and struggles in his own life. 

Naturally and Freely...

Yesterday was my birthday...The birthday wishes started pouring in around 4:00 a.m. and continued in a steady stream until late last night. I enjoyed the most marvelous day with my dearest friend. I felt so surrounded by love, that I was lifted up from all the cares in the world.

I could have never dreamed this gift at any point in my life. As I have struggled feeling that I have to ALWAYS be proving myself to everyone, and earning everyone's love this day has come as an overwhelming and uplifting surprising gift. I can be acknowledged for who I am, my accomplishments, and my artistic style. I can simply be loved.

I know I have bad days, where I can be devastatingly hard on myself and others. I have a sweet feeling that this feeling of being loved and accepted will sustain me and make these times less inpactful and therefore more profound in there own right to my life.

I also feel my heart opening and blossoming life a rose toward everyone in my life. Naturally, and freely. 

No Trouble Today

Simply put, I know there are no new thoughts in the world. As I live, words and thoughts touch my life profoundly. So today I'm not writing anything personally. I am borrowing today's thought from the book, One Day At A Time. I can only hope that it can impact you as profoundly as it impacts me.

Just for today I will not be afraid of anything.  If my mind is clouded with nameless dreads, I will track them down and expose their unreality.  I will remind myself that God is in charge of me and mine and that I have only to accept His protection and guidance.  What happened yesterday need not trouble me today.

This is a brand new shining day and I have it in my power to make it a good one just by the way I think about it and what I do with it.

If I live just this one day at a time, I will not so readily entertain fears of what might happen tomorrow.  If I am concentrating on today’s activities, there will be no room in my mind for fretting and worrying.  I will fill every minute of this day with something good-seen, heard, accomplished.  Then, when the day is ended, I can look back on it with satisfaction and serenity.

“I recall the words of an old ditty that said: ‘Never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you.’”

What Inspires Me...

A big milestone in my life is coming up this week; my 41^st birthday. I realize that it is only now that I am beginning to live my passion. It truely is never to late, to live your passion. What is my passion, what is my gift to give? So I started looking around me for something - really anything - that might inspire me.

The cliché' (did I spell that right?) “Housewives, sit around all day in their robe, watching t.v., and eating Bon Bons.” I thought, "Huh, I'd like to be in my robe all day!” Well, maybe not all day, but this freedom certainly intrigued me. So I knew that whatever I ended up doing, I definitely wanted lots of flexibility and freedom.

I admire my friend who is a volunteer EMT in our community. She seems to be on call 24/7...Even though she works hard all day at her job, is a mom, and a wife she still finds time to serve her community. Her generosity and integrity really move me, and add a desire to touch people in some way was ignited.

Another dear friend has such a strong work ethic, and the deepest empathy toward the people she works with. Anyone can clearly see her passion and sincerity towards people. Seeing her joy and passion really made me re-prioritize and put more emphasis on happiness and balance in my life.

My mom had to go through a year of physical therapy after two knee replacements, and her determination and fearlessness was incredibly inspiring. Her desire and motivation to better herself was incredible to see and made me feel like I could do anything I set my mind to.

I am most profoundly inspired by my husband...He is always calm in a crisis. He adjust with the sudden changes in life, especially when they are starkly out of his control. (which most things in life are) I am inspired to trust the flow of life, because of this amazing hubby of mine.

Inspiration is all around me - but I still had not discovered my passion or purpose. I decided to take some time to reflect. I started to dance when the mood strikes, take more pictures (lots more pictures), scrapbook; because I love to preserve memories and I love to create art. Scrapbooking is a perfect passionate combination of two things I love to do.

As for the people in my life who inspired me to follow my heart, my heart is full of love and gratitude for you and your courage to follow your passion.

In the end, I've realized that for me, my purpose in life is not so much about finding that one thing I am meant to do, but rather a constant unfolding journey of growing, appreciating, loving, learning, creating new things... and most importantly, experiencing tons of joy!

As I finish this, I realize that a whole day has gone by, and yes, I’m still in my robe. I should probably change... nah!

Snowflakes

What a marvelous Thanksgiving this has been for me. I've had the blessed chance to read everyone's post on FaceBook all month about the things they are thankful for. I took the opportunity to examine all the things I am thankful for. Sure I could list things like family, friends, warmth, and go on and on in this manner. Instead, I found my focus of gratitude going toward the details in my life. I am so blessed and thankful for the way the breeze sounds as it ruffles the leaves on the quaky trees out in the yard. As I watch the beauty in the uniqueness of each snowflake I can't help but know that I have a blessing as delicate and unique as each of those snowflakes to be thankful for. 

Dare to Dream a Bigger Dream

Daydreams can be deceptive.

When we are in a place of imagination, we see ourselves receiving the best gifts, having the finest things, achieving the highest goals within our capabilities. However, these dreams have edges. When we are imagining where we might be or what we might become, we typically see ourselves achieving only that which our inner eye accepts as possible. The scope of acceptability is built upon the foundation of our experiences. Life has carefully schooled us in what we might become - or so we think.

It is only when we become willing to step beyond the edges of our dreams that we find that God has something more for us. His dream for us has no bounds or limits and, in fact, He is anxious to bring us to a place where we will find that we were given special gifts that He would have us to use.

When we step beyond the edges of our own daydreams, we often find that we were not in the correct dream at all. We may discover that we had been dreaming the dream that someone else had placed in us. We may discover that we chose the wrong dream based on an incorrect understanding of our abilities. We may even discover that we had somehow allowed ourselves to dream a dream that didn't require us to face truths about ourselves.

When I was a tiny girl, I had dreams. But my dreams were small. I couldn't know that I would move out of my small town, work with computers, and interact with people who live around the world. The ability to do these things did not exist when I was a child. It was, therefore, impossible for me to dream the dream I am living.

But God knew what was coming, and He carefully prepared me throughout my life to take up the challenge. He filled me with a strange love of business (and this is a fearful thing for a girl who was raised in the 70s). He took me from one profession to another, where I gained the experience required to manage the challenges I now have. He even provided me with a husband who supports me in every way he can, so that I can do my work, which is unique for someone raised during my generation.

I found myself living as I am when I told God that I was tired of trying to figure out my life myself. I told Him that I was willing to do whatever He wanted me to do. I opened my mind to His answers and then accepted them by immediately acting on thoughts or impressions of what I should do.

These moments of guidance appeared at the most inconvenient times (such as when I was climbing into bed), and often only after I exhausted every known source that I could find on my own. But, when I followed them, I found that His visions for me opened up wider before my eyes. Over time, I learned that it is only when I fall back on my own resources that the edges of the dreams appear, and I begin to feel like I am pushing against a wall. When I fall back on my own resources, I forget to dream at all.

So, dare to dream. Dare to dream a bigger dream than you have for yourself. Dare to see the limitless dream that God has waiting for you.

If Only...

If Only...Control+Z worked in real life.

• Undo that comment I made during the fight I had with my husband.
• Undo that lazy day where I procrastinated too much.
• Undo that moment when I lost control of my anger with my daughter.
• Undo that horrible two-month depression.

But if Control+A worked, would I really be the woman I am today?

Maybe I need Control+G to "clip and change" to the circumstance.

• Learn to think before speaking.
• Discover the joy of getting things done, then being lazy.
• Offer apologies and receive forgiveness from my daughter over my anger.
• Know that God made me perfectly, and that includes my emotions, and He has great plans for me.

If only shortcuts would work in life...

What Kind Of Eggs Do You Like?

As I begin to reflect on the 2011 year, and my progress and growth this year I have a lot to be thankful for. I know that we have talked about this before, but I would like to address it again. One of the biggest attributes of Co-dependency is the last of ones self. I've given so much of myself over my life time that I don't really have a self to reflect on.

One of my favorite movies is...Run Away Bride, not because it starts Julia Roberts and Richard Gear although that doesn't hurt...Anyway, it is because Richard Gear's character asks her “What are your favorite kind of eggs? Julia Roberts character seems to like the same eggs as the fellow that she is in a relationship with. This question begs the character to find her self so that she can stop running...It begs the same soul searching question of me. I have taken this past month and gone a very soul searching journey to find out what kind of eggs I like...seemingly coincidentally I actually don't like eggs. I'm super glad that this is a philosophical question.

I created this scrapbook page in honor of some of the “eggs” I like. This is a very personal journey so this page only reflects some of the deeper “eggs” in my life.

Now I ask you, “What kind of eggs do you like?”

Simply

Change is so hard for me. I believe that every penny saved is a penny earned, so I have started to “clip coupons.” The week I've saved about $90.00 in coupons and ads. Now it isn't extreme couponing, but $90.00 is big money to me and my family.

I committed to a simpler life, and when I did I had no idea what lessons are learned in change and simplicity. I am learning that living simple, is hard work. It takes dedication, and self-motivation to do the leg work that others aren't willing to do, (as of not to long ago neither was I).

I'm learning that it isn't possible to “do it all,” nor is it desirable. I love seeing the beauty in other people's creativity. I have learned a lot from watching other people create and do the things I used to think I needed to do myself. I have learned how narrow minded I am in the way I see things and do things. That narrow mindedness, is rather funny. I have known for a while that I've missed out on a lot in my life, but until recently I just haven't realized just how much.

I sure am blessed to be given this second change at making a new life. I love that I can sit back and simply watch the flowers grow, as I clip the coupons of my new and simple life. 

Thank you to everyone for everything you do to help and teach me....I simply love you.

Your Color

Color - our world is so full of color everywhere we look. There are so many shades of one color that you may get lost in your search for one particular color or another. It’s amazing to me to look out at a beautiful fall day and see all the colors of the leaves and how they change even throughout the season of fall. As I sat at my table looking at a very bright green Tupperware® cup with a matching lid and straw, I was overcome with my appreciation of color.

The world didn't have to be in color. God could have given us a world with just shades of gray and black. We would never have known the difference, but He chose the vibrant and soft colors to display His creation.

Our God designed it this way, and He chose to give us color as a gift. He chose the spectrum and made it something for us to enjoy. We could have been born color blind as I know some people are. But apart from the medical condition, color blindness has two meanings to me.

The first meaning of color blindness is that we don't see the difference in skin or nationality in the people of this earth. We just view them all as God's creation and a beautiful array of culture and diversity. This is the only kind of color blindness that I choose to have - to accept others as God made them.

Secondly, the worse kind of color blindness is when we miss the beauty of the people around us. I have two daughters who are like night and day. The oldest, I would say, is soft pink, and the younger is bright red. The soft pink is sweet and gentle and often needs loving affirmation in her creativity. She is a tender rosebud with much beauty to unfold, but I sometimes miss this because of the bright, flaming red of my younger daughter. Granted, she can be tender, too, but she is more fire and ice than the tender rosebud. The younger one is straightforward and loud whereas her older sister is more meek and quiet.

I have realized that I could let myself be color blind and miss the array of colors that people everywhere have to offer. Some may be gold or rust-colored because of the richness of their lives and the things they have been through in life. Others may be hot pink or orange because they possess a fire and zest for life that keeps others inspired around them. Then there are those blues and greens that are calm, cool, and collected throughout life, no matter the circumstances.

Yes, there are blends of color, too, and some may be a mixture of more than one shade of color, but their most noticeable color stands out among the others. I am still learning how to let my color shine because I often get intimidated by all those bright and shining colors out there. I have my bright shades, but I am a softer color like my oldest daughter, and we have to work a little harder to get our color out there.

Each one has their own unique color to offer the world. We have a spectrum of color, even in people. You are the only one who can display your shade of color, so go out and spread your color on the canvas of the world, and let the ones around you know how much they mean to you by letting them spread their color next to yours.

Learning how to spread my color,
May Angels Walk With You--